Just BE

In my last post I mentioned I recently had a rejuvenating experience that has left me more prepared for this upcoming adventure that anything since I applied. 

Last weekend began with 4 friends pulling their every effort to try and pack up a Jeep and drive 5 hours to the middle-o'-nowhere Maine for an adventurous weekend. The plan was to Whitewater Raft on Saturday and do a nice nature walk on Sunday! I was so excited to just get away and not be able to do anything in terms of preparation for PC or even for work. Little did I know how much I needed this. Our drive up was long, and slow, as we hit rush hour traffic leaving Boston and made several stops for liquor and beer, food and of course bathroom breaks. Around 9pm we got off the main highway and started driving on a very windy, very dark road in the backwoods of this massive state. It was so quite and there were HUGE bugs splatting on the front windshield of my friends car. Were riding along and all of a sudden we are there. You could here the music and see the fire being burned in front of the outpost where the fun was going to take place! Because my boyfriend, Bill, works there, we got quite the VIP treatment. They knew who I was when we walked in, we got "upgraded" to a tent site by the river, had firewood waiting for us at our site and were able to choose our guide! - Bill of course! We drove to our site and set up camp! sat y the fire roasting marshmallows and having a couple of beers, this was perfect.

The next morning I woke up feeling like I had gotten pumped with fresh oxygen and clorafil! I felt like a new person - the fresh air, sounds of the river flowing and rushing by and the distant smell of firewood cooling itself off. This was the beginning of of what seems to be a long awaited sigh of relief. As we gathered our things and prepared for a day on the river, I couldn't help but just BE. I often set aside time for BEing and meditation but this was different. It was happening unintentionally.

I dressed in all pink for rafting and got my butt in gear! We had a few newbies in our raft and paddled our way through class IV rapids. I loved hearing Bill yelling out the commands - primarily because I could hear how quickly he got the hang of this and how natural he is at it. It made me happy to know that he is right where he is supposed to be. After rafting we got a huge meal that consisted of steak, mashed potatoes, corn, the whole nine yards! It began to pour outside so the four of us played the best board game in the world - you had to act things out, answer trivia, do random tasks and having others guess it, etc. We shared a few pitchers of Summer Ale and laughed all afternoon. I felt like I was on the set of Dirty Dancing where there are activities going on in the main hall and it is down pouring outside. The evening was spent at the bar listening to live music and watching a hollow log being burned - hollow log is a great idea for a large fire! 

Sunday was my favorite. We all took a walk to Moxie falls through a mile(ish) long path that was filled with natural beauty. There was moss everywhere - for those of you who don't know, I LOVE Moss! I think it is the coolest living thing and is proof that life is so interconnected. We got to the falls and that is when it happened - this was when my mind went from just BEing to a level of awareness that only comes around when I am inspired by something bigger than me. We took an unbeaten path to get to the rapids and sit on the rocks by the river. I got in the water and moved myself to the middle of the river to sit on a rock in the middle of a rapid. the four of us were spread out at different parts of the river doing our own thing. I began reflecting on things that are greater than ourselves and how it can be so easy to be shifted away from that. I reminded myself that my existence is but an 1/8th of a second in the history of life and time. The power that being in a place like that has on me is profound and since then I have felt a sense of ease that I may have lost somewhere in between travels of last summer, the application process of Peace Corps, the transition to a new job and the idea that in just a few months the chaos will be over. 

We gathered after our own adventures on the river and chilled on the rocks - I noticed how great it was that we were all okay just doing our own thing while still having an amazing time together - these are the moments to be aware of and how lucky we are to experience them! It's probably helpful to keep in mind that the four of us work in mental health and love to reflect - which is exactly what we did!

Throughout the week I felt a sense of ease and silence that I felt ready to take on any task put in front of me to prepare for Peace Corps - my packing list has been getting checked off quite a bit this week, I have been focused on things I need to do and I can think more clearly and straight than I have in a while. I was talking to Bill and realized that this ease is what I always get when I am able to just BE - I get it when I have the opportunity to meditate at home - that is, when there isn't so much chaos happening. I am looking forward to the down time I will have in the DR  and using a bit of it to implement more of this into my daily routine.

Tomorrow I am heading to Walden Pond, only 20 minutes away, for a morning of R&R with a new book and a walk around the pond! I know there are going to be a ton of screaming kids around.. that's okay, it's all part of the experience!

    BEST part about tomorrow - Bill just told me he is going to drive down tomorrow until Tuesday morning 

                                                    This makes me happy :)

Although I have been living in what seems to be "la-la land" to some people, I have been doing this while living amongst chaos. Simultaneously living in the opposite of calm, relaxed and rejuvenated. Stay tuned to find out more.... 

Happy Reading!